You never want to let go of Memories!

July 2, 2018 by Guest WriterHome Connect 1 Essays, Personal Stories, Rural Insights

A “Home Connect” Essay:

“No matter how much suffering you went through, you never wanted to let go of those memories.” ― Haruki Murakami

The Home is located in Bomdila, in West Kameng district of the State of Arunachal Pradesh in India. The Writer has chosen to remain anonymous.

Image Source – Author

Read the story of this home in Bomdila here…

You never want to let go of Memories!

Today is Father’s Day (June 17th, 2018) and the social media being full of post and pictures with dads and I still thinking whether to join the bandwagon and post something. Then suddenly I realized that my Paa (the way I love calling him) is not a fan of social media. So, I just changed my WhatsApp DP and made it visible to only my contacts. And the DP says, “Behind every successful women is a loving Father”. I know it sounds a bit cliché, but it holds true and I had to do it.

My childhood memories are all related with my mother. I spent my childhood in a village in Arunachal Pradesh. My father was working for the State Government and was posted in a village where he met my mother and got married. We had a nice and big kitchen garden where my parents use to grow all vegetables one can think of. My parents were so much into kitchen garden and it was kind of their passion. My father still is into gardening and do it as a hobby now after his retirement. Life was kind of different at that time. It was all about eating breakfast, lunch and dinner together with family. It was all about laughing and watching movies together.

When I was 10 years old my mother was diagnosed with Myasthenia Gravis which is a very rare disease in India according to the statistics. I was bare of the age to understand the medical severity of this disease, but one thing which I understood at that age was that my mother’s disease cannot be cured permanently. It can only be suppressed up to a limit through continuous medication. So, my parents spent most of the time away home for mom’s medical treatment. At that time telephones were considered a luxury item and we didn’t had one. So, every day at 5 pm me and my brother use to stand in front of our gate to see who gets down from the bus with the hope that parents will be back today. There was only a single daily bus service from that village which goes to city in the morning at 8 am and returns back from city in the evening at 5 pm.

I being the eldest one had to refrain myself from getting emotional and letting my brother know how much I miss them. I had to be strong and cheerful for him. Our maternal Grandmother supported us throughout our childhood and also when I fall apart. For my brother I ended up becoming the go to person to ask and seek permission if he wants anything. And he is like this till date. Whenever he pings me in WhatsApp, my next question will be how much money you want. May be the bonding we grew is very strong because of the tough times when we stand by each other like rock solid.

I was good at studies according to my parents since childhood. They helped me in every possible way to pursue my dreams. They sacrificed their own comfort and dreams for my studies and ambitions. They never said no to anything that I asked for. I had the biggest collection of books among all my classmates.

Despite all the emotional pain that I went through I always fought and worked hard. I took a break from my studies in the year 2008 to stay at home with my mother. Her long-term disease took the form of cancer and she was in her advance stage. I saw her struggling and battling for life. After a very long and tiring battle she passed away in 2009. I was 17 at that time. After that I decided to move out for further studies and appeared for AIEEE. With a high state rank of around 20 in the examination conducted at the national level, I made it into National Institute of Technology.

When I joined my undergraduate studies at NIT, I came across other highly talented and motivated students from all over India who encouraged me to perform better and better at every semester and ended up getting a “Gold Medal” for my academic excellence. After that I applied for MS and got accepted in one of the best universities in Europe. But then came the main part of the studies – funding. Till now everyone might have got an idea that the family I come from is not well off to fund my masters in Europe. With a little hope I applied for scholarship and fortunately I was selected among other applicants.

I often think of home. A home where I feel safe walking alone at night, where I can breathe fresh air. With my education, I can aspire to make other people’s lives better in the village. I dream of a future where you have all the latest technologies but still make you feel connected to your roots, where you take a minute from your life and say hello to your neighbors and loved ones.

“No matter how much suffering you went through, you never wanted to let go of those memories.” ― Haruki Murakami